Mission: bomb the F*****G Moon

'Every time we bomb a corner of planet earth we get complaints and street protests... So we've decided to blow the F*****G Moon for blowing things' sake!"

NASA will tomorrow launch a spectacular mission to...

Bomb the Moon! [To Shock-and-Awe those Eyeranian and show them we can dig big holes...)

Their LCROSS mission will blast off from Cape Canaveral, bankrupt Florida, carrying a missile that will blast a hole in the lunar surface at twice the speed of a bullet. (Wow!)

The missile, a Centaur rocket, will be steered by a shepherding spacecraft that will guide it towards its target - a crater close to the Moon's south pole.

Scientists (?) expect the blast to be so powerful that a huge plume of debris will be ejected. (Just like they did the The World Trade Center Towers! Blowing things up is USSA Trade Mark!)

The attack on Moon is not a declaration of war or act of wanton vandalism (It's F*****G dangerous junk science). Space scientists want to see if any water ice or vapour is revealed in the cloud of debris. [So we can bottle it and sell it to you assholes. "Gee... Moon Water Cola tastes out of this world!]

Though the Moon mostly a dry airless desert, they believe ice could be trapped in crater shadows near the south pole which never receive any sunlight. If so it could provide vital supplies for a manned moonbase. More science